I wish I never had to grow up...

Weight: 159.2lbs

Listening to: Tied together with a smile - Taylor Swift

hey,

today in the queue at costco, there was a woman holding her newborn son (who I later found out was only two weeks old and was called Billy! bless him...). this little boy spent the full fifteen minutes with his eyes shut tight, oblivious to everyone around him smiling at him, talking about him. i wish i had that kind of innocence nowadays. i wish i didn't have to grow up, and i could still be a tiny little baby with no cares in the world. it was just so easy. close your eyes and you didn't have to see bad things. now, even if i close my eyes to all the bad things i see, i feel worse things inside.

anyway, enough soppy rubbish!

today's intake:

activia yoghurt: 123cals

costco chicken and bacon wrap (ew): 700 fucking calories.

oh. my. god.

i only just checked out the calories on that chicken wrap and that is bloody disgsuting. like.... EW.

i was planning on purging it, but the bathroom is right opposite my sisters room and she'd hear everything. i tried running the shower and the bath but it would still be heard :/

now i feel like i'm going to throw up, even though i ate that wrap like four hours ago. 700 calories?! what is IN that shit?!

i think i'm going to go and finish watching THIN now. I got up to about part 8 yesterday, where Polly got kicked out. i was really angry about that; how can they just give up on her like that? yeah, okay, she was damaging other patients recovery but couldn't they of sent her somewhere else or something, instead of just kicking her out. they basically just gave up on her, because she was "too much trouble" and a "bad seed". Rest in peace Polly <3

Quote of the day: "you will bring beauty from the pain"